HOW SHOULD A HUSBAND TREAT HIS WIFE

How should a husband treat his wife?

This article is a translation from an important book by Ibrahim Hakki, a well-known Islamic scholar and scientist,(1703-1780) which is called Marifetname. This part deals with advice for men as to how to treat their wives. Look at how Islam values women and how an Islamic scholars perspective of women was back in 18th century, way before the womens basic rightswere accepted in the other countries of the world.
“Oh my friend, You have to be gentle, understanding and friendly to your wife. you have to talk with her in a polite and soft way and with sweetness of words. Our beloved Prophet said: The best of people is the one who is beneficial and helpful to his wife and his housemembers”. when you findher sad and worried, you need to say you love her and you need to cheer her up with compassion as she might be feeling depressed or hopeless atthat time at home. You should be her best friend, and her support in her troubles. You should help her with the education of the children. The children will not give her a break and rest as they whine, cry, and ask for things day and night. If you help her, her Lord Allah will help you too. About the mistakes she did, you must not get angry or say rude words. Even when you have to give her silent treatment, you should cut it after one day. When you discover a bad habit of hers or a behavior you did not like about her, you should find the fault in you and say: “if I was a better person and had better behavior, she would be nicer, too”.
When she gets angry, you have to be silent. When you do not respond her, she would regret and apologize to you. When sheis helping, supporting and serving you, you should pray for her and you should thank and praise Allah since your wife, who is a good match for you, is a bounty by God that you could never be grateful enough for.
You have to treat your wife in a way that she needs to think “my husband loves me more than anyone.”
About the household and financial issues, you have to consult her and talk together. You should not bother your wife with your other big troubles and issues. You need toignore her bad behaviors unlessthey are forbidden by Allah, that is, unless she is committinga sin.
You have to hide her secret faults and her private matters from everybody. You should make compliments , appropriatejokes, and create entartainment for your wife. Our beloved Prophet Muhammad would compliment, mingle and make jokes with his wife. He was the ultimate gentlemen and the most refined person towards his wife. Once he had a race with his wife and his wife won,in the second time, he won.
Mild and pleasant conversationswill bond you with your wife. You need to read to each other about the basics and pillars of Islam, and the other necessary knowledge and sciences. You have to provide for her whatever you have for yourself in terms of clothing, food, and so on.

Culled from: Dailytrust